potential-and-difference:

prop-215:

dazegetbrighter:

what if rocks are actually soft but just tense up when we touch them?

How stoned are you right now?

Was that a fucking pun?

“faster,” i moaned. “why won’t this page load faster?”

lornemilee:

HA so these guys in the library were joking around and one is like “So when’s our date?” and they started discussing when and where and what. Then they hugged really hard and slowly pulled apart and just kind of stopped a second and the other was like “… you really gonna take me on a date?” and the first guy is like, “Uh… yeah, man I’ll take you on a date.” AND THE SECOND GUY SEEMED SO EXCITED GUYS I THINK I JUST WITNESSED THE BEGINNING OF SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL

society: oh you have your period? well you have two options.
woman: okay.
society: you can use sanitary pads, which make you feel like you are wearing a diaper, and have the added fun benefit of being extremely uncomfortable and give you the extreme paranoia that they will not be enough coverage and at any moment with any movement or sudden sneeze you'll bleed over onto your clothes and walk around all day with blood stained trousers while everyone points and laughs at you.
woman: sounds awful. what's my second option.
society: a penis shaped wad of cotton that you shove uncomfortably inside yourself and it catches the blood before it leaves your body.
woman: still seems pretty awful.
society: wait! it gets better! there's the outside chance that using those will kill you!
woman: well, are they at least free? like how men can have access to free condoms? i mean, it's not like i'm choosing for this to happen.
society: HAHAHA! that's funny. no, you have to pay for them. and they're really fucking expensive.
woman:
society: oh, and if you tell anyone that you ARE on your period, your judgement, opinions, and reactions are going to be dismissed as the crazy ramblings of a lunatic.
woman:
society:
woman: i think i'll go with my third option.
society:
woman:
society: what third option?
woman: i think i'll bleed on everything you love.

sarcastics:

if you start kissing my neck there’s a 169% chance i’m going to rip your clothes off

thevoicecalledcheesecake:

In case you still don’t understand how badly women have had it, when anaesthetic was first invented doctors weren’t allowed to give it to women who were giving birth because the church said that the pain of childbirth was God punishing women for not being men

fulmadz:

Call me selfish but I don’t want you to meet somebody that makes you forget about me.

me: I should go shower now
(five minutes later)
(another five minutes later)
(yet another five minutes later)
(more five minute intervals)
someone: (goes into the bathroom)
me: wow fuck you I was JUST about to go take a shower

amortizing:

third wheeling two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple

buttermilkqueen:

dont u dare treat ur animals like shit in front of me i will end ur life son

humpthe-moist-cavewall:

lumos5001:

benedictcumbercake:

inbox:

I’m a teenager why does my back hurt I’m not 70 years old

Boobs.

period cramps

*Mom voice* it’s that damn computer again

Other people are not medicine.
It took me 9 years to figure that out (via ivoryunknown)

clvbpenguin:

my mom doesn’t even text me back

somethinghorrible:

tHERES A SKELETON INSIDE MY BODY RIGHT NOW OH MY GOD